Always on the fringes
Too out going
Always on the fringe but wanting to fit in
Get a taste
only to be cast aside
Your not the bright new shiny anymore.
You hang on the fringe because you need to feel like you are not alone. But it is not enough.
You are too loud! Too weird! Too normal! Attention hog! Stop trying so hard!
Your inside voice is screaming all these.
Still you crave attention.
You are a mistake.
No one really cares.
Everything you do is wrong.
It would be better to disappear.
The little voice constantly on repeat.
So you smile.
You say every thing is alright.
Because you would rather be on the fringes than alone.
*I wrote this because this is where my mind goes when I am stressed or down. The process of my husband getting a service dog, having challenging children, feeling guilty for being envious of him/them/friends. I got some good feedback on FetLife so I figured I would put it here also.*